I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Are we still banned from the library?
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
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