No stitches, just platelets and will power
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Randomize