I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
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