I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
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