susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
Randomize