This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
