i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
