MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
