He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
