and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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