You really coming over, don't trick.
i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize