a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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