We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Randomize