mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
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