Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
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