Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
