Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
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