My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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