I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
It's Friday. Sex?
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize