He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Holy shit dude........stairs
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