If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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