beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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