You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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