from now on my penis is your penis
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize