i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
