some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Randomize
