No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Randomize
