So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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