tell your sister to shave her snatch
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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