I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Randomize