So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Randomize