That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Randomize