If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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