I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize