Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
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