You're completely useless in the revolution.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Randomize
