They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
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