i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
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