i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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