I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize