I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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