could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
I wish i was in the wii world.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
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