just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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