69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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