One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Randomize