The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize