chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
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