He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Randomize
