Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
she told me i tasted like america
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
