I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
Randomize
