you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I licked your asshole in confidence.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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