shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
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