# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Randomize
